10. sometimes stays in bed until after 5am
9. in his drawers, you find pics of women without bonnets
8. shows up at barn raisings in full KISS makeup
7. when you criticize him he yells "thou sucketh!"
6. his name is Jebediah, but he goes by Jeb Daddy
5. defiantly says, "if i had a radio, i'd listen to rap"
4. you come upon his secret stash of colored socks
3. uses slang expression "talk to the hand cause the beard ain't listening"
2. was recently pulled over for driving under the influence of cottage cheese
1. he's wearing his big black hat backwards